Monday 4 June 2012

The Good Wife


My best friend Caroline is trying to help me become a good woman. This includes praying, making my bed in the morning and peeling vegetables. When making food you should place a banana leaf over your clothes to prevent them from getting dirty, wear a long skirt and place your legs to one side or kneel and take extra care to never squat in the food. "Womens work" may sound like drudgery but it is actually a lot of fun. With the men away, women gather to gossip and talk without interuption.

Eventually when I get married I will be expected to rise early and make breakfast while I tidy the house. Then when my husband eats I should make the bed and finish cleaning. I should send him off to work with clean clothes and a full stomach and afterward finish the housecleaning and then go to my own job. Men and women are equals she tells me but that if I love him, I will help him get food and his clothes clean, even though He can do it himself. (Don’t get any ideas David this is never going to happen).I know how to peel vegetables and matooke so I help out in the kitchen with Aunty but whenever I do Ugandan men will come up to me and say what a good wife I would make. My feminist instinct makes me want to tell them where to go but then I realize it is a compliment here and I should accept it graciously.

One male staff member told me He was going to pray for me. He hoped that I would marry a good man and have two children. I did not have the heart to tell him I do not plan on having children and even marriage is not on my priority list. I am only 21 and plan on treating life as an adventure and travelling as much as I can,  maybe even becoming a diplomat and living and studying abroad for a few years. I firmly believe in understanding yourself and becoming independant and strong before devoting yourself to one person for the rest of your life. While I am doing that I hope my future husband will learn to make his own breakfast. Maybe I should send a prayer of my own to his God just in case it works a little too well?

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